Wedding chaos tears siblings apart as one sister insists the other pay her expenses

A family's relationship is in tatters over one sibling's demands of another connected to a wedding — and now the aggrieved sister in the scenario, confident she is in the right but desperate to keep the peace, is reaching out for help to people on social media.

A woman describing herself as 27 years old said she was "the only person" in her family to attend college and "get out of poverty."

She said her family is from a small town (she didn't say which one) — and that they "struggled a lot" while she was growing up. 

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"I got out," the woman continued on Reddit — "but it's hard because I make a good salary now and my family expects me to share it."

She added, "I still have student loans and bills to pay, but they seem to think I’m rolling in money. I also bought an apartment in 2019 — and when my parents found out, they called me selfish and wanted me to pay for their expenses."

Said the woman, "I have loaned money to my parents (about $800) and they ‘forgot’ they borrowed money and claimed I forgot that I gave it as a gift" to them and that they didn't need to "repay" the loan. 

She went on, "My sister and I used to have a good relationship — but once I left for college and did better, our relationship got more strained."

"We went to the grocery store and she bought $1700 worth of groceries."

The woman explained that her sister was getting married — so she "came back a few days before the wedding to help her set everything up."

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Continued the young woman, "We went to the grocery store and she bought $1700 worth of groceries, since we were cooking [the food] for the wedding."

However, added the woman about her sister, "Her [credit] card was denied … She tried a few [others] but they were all denied."

The young woman went on, "We stepped aside and she called the credit card company to find out she nearly maxed out her cards. She started to panic and checked her accounts and found out she [had just] $200 left in checking."

The woman added, "I told her to check savings — and she snapped back [that] she didn’t have any … Our mom checked her card and still had $600, so she said she would cover $600 and volunteered me for the other $1,100."

Wrote the 27-year-old woman of what happened next, "I told them I didn’t have the money. I did, but I don’t think my sister would have the money to pay me back."

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Things then took an even more difficult turn, the woman made clear.

"My sister demanded to see proof that I had maxed out my credit cards," wrote the young woman on Reddit, "and I didn’t have any money in my checking and I told her I don’t have to give her proof [that] I just don’t have the money."

The sister about to be married then "started crying and yelling at me," wrote the woman, "that I was looking down on her for being broke, and she knew I have the money [and] I’m just being stingy."

Continued the woman, "My mom started on me, too, telling me that people are staring and people are going to gossip about this, and I was humiliating my sister for making it seem like she couldn’t even afford her own wedding."

Well — at that point, "I had enough and walked out and told them I’d had it with them expecting me to pay for everything," wrote the woman.

"My sister sent me a text saying I was no longer welcomed to the wedding."

"I walked back to my parents' house and my sister sent me a text saying I was no longer welcomed to the wedding."

Finished the young woman, "I drove home without another word and I’m wondering if I should have just put the groceries on my card to keep the peace."

Fox News Digital reached out a psychologist for professional perspective on the family drama, as well as an etiquette expert.

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Said New York City-based clinical psychologist Dr. Jayme Albin, "This situation has a lot to do with a toxic sibling relationship and an ongoing imbalance of power and parental favoritism. Paying for the groceries will or would have put a bandaid on a bad situation that needs to be addressed."

"It will be your job to set strong boundaries with your family if you want to maintain a relationship with them."

She added, addressing the young woman who shared her story, "If you really want to go to the wedding, than offer to chip in what you can. But recognize your sibling has no boundaries and strong expectations about your success — and probably an inflated point of view of it."

Dr. Albin also said, "It will be your job to set strong boundaries with your family if you want to maintain a relationship with them … Stand your ground."

Meanwhile, over 6,500 people reacted to the drama, with some 1,200 people chiming in with comment.

One person wrote bluntly to the young woman about her dilemma, "I don't believe for a second that she [the sister] didn't know that she didn't have enough money to cover $1700 in groceries." 

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Wrote another commenter, "Setting aside that weddings are already grossly overly expensive, it's clear she didn't plan, save or budget well for this. None of which is something you're responsible for."

Said the same person, "If the family is just going to treat you like a piggy bank, then just removing yourself from the situation sounds like the best move."

"Your family isn't struggling with poverty — there are plenty of families living on low incomes. They're struggling with chaotic, dishonest relationships."

Another commenter articulated thoughts quite clearly: "If she'd asked you for a $1700 wedding gift, that would at least have been an honest request. Instead, she tried to embarrass you in the grocery store line, assuming that you'd cave in."

Continued this same commenter, "It might help you to reframe this: Your family isn't struggling with poverty — there are plenty of families living on low incomes. They're struggling with chaotic, dishonest relationships."

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The person went on, "I would think about what you are and aren't willing to do for them financially and then decide if you want to stay in contact. It's possible that they may not have the self-control to respect any boundaries you set."

"Please don’t give any of these people another dime."

Another individual said this: "You don't owe these users anything. Your sister should have planned better for her wedding and not expected you to cover it."

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And still another said, "Your sister is marrying someone else, right? Where are they and why can't they also contribute to the costs? The sister can elope or choose to have a more affordable wedding. Her wedding plans shouldn't be fronted by anyone else."

Added this person, "Don't stress out about it. It (usually) isn't your responsibility to make others happy."

Finally, someone else said of the woman's family, "Please don’t give any of these people another dime."