Wedding anniversary gone awry puts wife and mother on defensive as Reddit users call the situation 'toxic'

A woman who shared her story of a 10th wedding anniversary gone awry received little sympathy from other users on Reddit, with one commenter calling the situation "toxic" and most slamming her for a lack of communication and thoughtfulness toward her husband.

Her post received over 5,000 reactions in less than 24 hours with some 1,000 comments posted about it as well.

Describing herself as 37 years old and married to her 38-year-old husband, the woman wrote that the couple's 10-year anniversary was last week. (She did not share her location.)

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"I took the day off [from] work to hopefully spend time with him, but it didn't happen," she said.

"I knew my husband had the day off, too, since he had taken call the day before," wrote "Illustrious_Goat_143." 

For her 10th wedding anniversary, a woman (not pictured) said she "made [her husband] breakfast. I brought it to him in bed, and he was still sleeping." She added, "No problem, I just ate it." (iStock)

The woman went on, "On our anniversary, when I woke up, I saw my gift on my end table. It wasn't wrapped, but I really did like the gift, so I didn't take issue." 

She continued, "After I dropped our kids" – an 8-year-old boy and a 7-year-old girl – "off at the bus stop, I went home and made him breakfast. I brought it to him in bed, and he was still sleeping. No problem, I just ate it."

"I asked if he had any plans for the day, and he said, ‘To relax.’"

She then wrote, "My husband woke up at around 9, said ‘Happy Anniversary,’ went downstairs, and made himself breakfast."

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The woman said, "I asked if he had any plans for the day, and he said, ‘To relax.’"

A husband and father (not pictured) took heat from his wife for a number of things that went wrong on their 10th wedding anniversary – but Reddit users had issues with the woman's actions and lack of communication.  (iStock)

She added, "I wanted to maybe go to a restaurant, or see a movie, or at least do something together, just me and him, and he said no. By then, I was a bit disheartened, but I took his answer."

She said that about 20 minutes later, she just got dressed "and head[ed] out… I just treated myself to the spa, shopping and stuff like that."

Was she wrong "for leaving my husband at home with our kids after he blew off our anniversary"? 

The woman shared that when she returned home around 6 p.m., her husband "was with our kids and by the time they went to bed, he brought up the fact that I left – and asked why I did so." 

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She shared that she "told him it was because I wasn't just going to do nothing all day because he wanted to, and that he didn't even care enough to spend time with me, so it wouldn't be an issue that I spent time alone."

"He didn't even care enough to spend time with me," a woman on Reddit said about her husband (not pictured) on their 10th wedding anniversary – but plenty of social media commenters had some pointed advice for the wife and mother. (iStock)

The woman wrote, "He went quiet after that, and while we've talked over it since then, I'm posting here [on Reddit] to see if my past actions were a--hole-like or not."

She asked others if she was wrong "for leaving my husband at home with our kids after he blew off our anniversary."

"Where was his gift? Did you get him one?"

In a reaction post that has since gotten some 11,000 "upvotes," another Reddit user had a series of direct comments for the woman.

This person wrote that the husband "is an [a--hole] for saying no when you asked him to do something and you’re an AH for a few reasons."

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The commenter went on, "Where was his gift? Did you get him one?"

Also, "if you made him breakfast while he was sleeping and then ate it, he made his breakfast – that’s not a point for you."

A Reddit drama involving a sparring couple and a missed opportunity for a nice time on their wedding anniversary has drawn a lot of attention online. (iStock)

Said the same commenter directly to the woman, "You didn’t communicate at all. You left him on your anniversary alone. If spending time together was really what you were after, you could’ve done that. You wanted to be spoiled/pampered."

The commenter finished the assessment with, "This post comes across [as] very ‘it’s my husband’s job to plan our anniversary and it’s my job to enjoy it.'"

"You know the one basis of a good marriage is communication."

Said another person on the platform, "Your husband was on call the day before. I am assuming [in] medicine. Call blows. The next day, all I want to do is rest."

This same individual noted, "You didn’t plan anything for him/or with him but expected him to pamper you. Then you just left."

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The person added, "This is toxic."

Another commenter tried to educate the poster about a few relationship basics. 

"You've been married for 10 years. You know the one basis of a good marriage is communication. If your husband wanted to stay home and you wanted to go out, fine and fair – but then you should have told him you were going out."

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Yet another person was blunter than most: "It's surprising you've made it to your 10th anniversary since neither of you knows how to communicate."

Fox News Digital reached out to a psychologist for thoughts on the couple's situation.

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