Holly Madison says she was in a 'cycle of gross things' while living at Playboy Mansion
The model lived in the Playboy Mansion for several years in the early 2000s
{{#rendered}} {{/rendered}}Holly Madison is opening up about her time living at the Playboy Mansion.
The model, now 41, was at the home from the early 2000s until she and Hugh Hefner split in 2008.
The star is set to appear in A&E’s docuseries "Secrets of Playboy," beginning on Jan. 24, 2022, and will spill the beans about what made her time there difficult.
{{#rendered}} {{/rendered}}"I got to a point not too far into my time there – I think I was only, like, six months in – where I kind of broke under that pressure and being made to feel like I need to look exactly like everybody else," she confessed in a clip from the show shared online on Tuesday.
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Like others at Playboy, Madison boasts long blonde hair.
{{#rendered}} {{/rendered}}"My hair was really long, naturally, and I was just like, ‘I’m going to go chop my hair off so I can at least look a little different,’" she recalled before alleging: "I came back with short hair and he [Playboy founder Hefner] flipped out on me and he was screaming at me and said it made me look old, hard and cheap."
A friend of Hefner’s also testified, recalling that the late magnate, who passed away in 2017, was "very unhappy" about Madison cutting her hair to about shoulder-length, while fellow Playboy alum Bridget Marquardt recalled Hefner being "pretty abrasive in the way he said things to Holly."
{{#rendered}} {{/rendered}}"She came down with red lipstick one time and he flipped out, said he hated red lipstick on girls [and that she] needed to take it off right away even though other people could wear red lipstick and it didn’t seem to bother him," Marquardt claimed. "It was very frustrating to live with every day – all the drama that was going on and the tensions."
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Marquardt added that Madison’s unhappiness was visible and that she could "definitely see that [Madison] was getting depressed and sad."
{{#rendered}} {{/rendered}}Holly Madison recalled cutting her long hair, which caused Hugh Hefner to allegedly begin "screaming at" her. (Denise Truscello/WireImage)
Things for Madison only got worse after she cut her hair.
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"I remember there were times, probably within the first couple years I lived there [at the Playboy mansion] when I felt like I was just in the cycle of gross things and I didn’t know what to do," Madison explained.
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The star is expected to expand on her story and claims during "Secrets of Playboy," which will also include interviews from other Playboy alums, offering up shocking claims of their own.