Chip Gaines says he and Joanna fought 'like hell' for their family: 'Hasn’t been a perfect story'

Chip and Joanna Gaines will celebrate 20 years of wedded bliss in May.

Like most married couples, Chip admitted there have been ebbs and flows in their relationship, but this particular milestone made him reminisce on how quickly time passed by.

In an essay for the summer issue of their Magnolia Journal, Chip recalled proposing to Joanna and buying their first house "just yesterday." He wrote, "All the old folks in our lives warned us that these years with young kids and big dreams would go by fast. That one day we’d look back and wonder where the time went. They were right."

"We've had to fight like hell for our family and learn to hold loosely what we can't control. But we did all that together. The two of us," he wrote.

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The home renovation expert felt a whirlwind of change as he thought of the last two decades of his life with Joanna. 

"In those 20 years, our world changed. But the one thing that didn't was the promise Jo and I made to one another at the altar in front of our family and friends," he wrote. "They asked if we'd stick it out through thick and thin. We said yes, and we meant it. We still do."

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He added, "Marriage is interesting that way. Whatever I go through, Jo goes through. And whatever she goes through, I go through. Life has done us plenty of favors and showed us things we've been beyond blessed to see. 

"We've also had some hard times—some the world knows about, and plenty it doesn't. Like anyone else, we've been sick and sad and hurt and lost and flat out of ideas on how to turn things around."

The Magnolia Market entrepreneurs first found fame flipping houses as the "Fixer Uppers" on HGTV. They pivoted away from the cameras in 2018 and have since been raising their five children while launching the Magnolia Network.

"Jo’s been focused on what it means to savor life. To savor the moments that, too often, we let slip away without a second thought. That word has taken root in my heart as well, but I’m finding that the moments I’ve savored the most over these past 20 years have also been the hardest ones," the carpenter wrote. 

"I don’t want to let those times get away from me. I treasure those memories of hardship and struggle." 

He added, "I treasure all the days our heads hit the pillow weary and worn-out from growing our family and our business. Because those are the moments when we leaned on each other the most. I think that’s the formative part. The strength that’s sown when you’re building together.

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"I’ve started to understand that hard times can go one of two ways. They can either break you apart, or they can bond you together. I think the key is to decide which one it’s going to be long before it makes the choice for you."

Chip noted that 20 years are behind them now, and chapters have "already been written."

"We might’ve wished back then for calmer seas and slower days when we were in the thick of parenting small kids and growing a business alongside them, but now I wouldn’t wish any of it away," he noted. 

"I’m so thankful to God for giving us exactly what we’ve had, and for what I know we still have ahead: plenty to build—hand-in-hand."

The summer issue of Magnolia Journal is available online now and on newsstands starting May 5.

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